whee!! i'm back from my one-day break of blogging.. haha.. update about my toe: it's still red as though it's bleeding continuously and it seems wet.. think got pus and it looks it's rotting.. ok, i'll stop the grossness.. but i think it's ok.. still a little pain whenever i accidentally hit it.. gosh, tell me, how to wear heels on sunday? mum said better for me to wear open-toed shoes.. but my heels are somehow either closed toe or too high! argh.. shall see how lah.. taking my vitamin C and applying zambuk to it.. i finally completed the craftwork for tmr! tmr's the big big big day! the day we've all been preparing since the start of the year.. the attachees have been notified.. reporting time for me tmr is 4pm.. till i dunno wad time.. so i doubt i'll be able to come online tmr nite.. owells, once this is over, we all can take a month or so break before we slowly start getting ideas for next year and i'll have a heavier position next year.. stress! lol... on another note, i was supposed to go in and teach today.. mum offered to let me go in instead but my toe? and i didn't want to make it worse before tmr.. so i declined.. let mum go in instead.. and i can't wear slipper or sandals to teach.. so yah.. anyway, remembered i said i was going to post the pics taken at the chalet? FYI, all pics have me with my fellow classmates.. and these pics were taken with my phone.. so quality may not be that good.. but nevertheless, enjoy!


that's gen, one of my HR member! and boy, she's real talented!


this is ben, the guy who taught me how to cycle but end up hurting myself.. he's a nice guy..


kai hui.. 2/3 of my clique is here.. kelly didn't come for BBQ.. :( if not could have a clique photo..


serene! nice girl.. and the guys esp. melvin like to bully her during finance tutorial cause they say she take down answers very slow..


and lastly, yong sing, year 1 classmate and 2B01's class rep... what a dumb facial expression.. known him for 1 1/2 years now.. doesn't seem that long, huh?

there is still a few more pics.. will upload them when kai hui sends me the pics! ok, out of here now.. toodles.. :)

-edited-
maybe cause i've forced myself not to think too much about you.. i no longer think so much of you anymore.. or whenever i think of you unknowingly, it's easy to get you out of my mind and not feel that emo anymore.. that must be the case, i guess.. but i know for sure is that those days which i spent with my class peeps at the chalet, i didn't think so much about you...

finally decide to blog.. haha.. was back home at 10 plus.. dad came to pick me up cause my slipper broke and i cut my toe.. so i couldn't go back on my own even if i stayed over. so called dad up to pick me.. but i was there rather early? was there at abt 12.30.. waited for melvin and yong sing to help carry the chicken wings and then we headed back to the chalet.. melvin was so nice that he accompanied me as i walk while he cycled... haha.. the guys in my class are always so nice.. you'll know why soon.. so slacked with them, lunched and then more slacking.. had a girls' talk with gen, kai hui, aisyah and amy while the guys went to swim.. they came back an hour later, chatted a while more and laughed and then we were off to start the bbq! helped to cook and did the minor errands.. let the guys take over after that while i just sat and talk to kai hui.. talk talk talk, camwhore camwhore camwhore.. she saw desheng's bike at the entrance of the chalet and wanted to cycle.. so i accompanied her with shaun and ben came out after that with his own bike.. so shaun taught kai hui and ben taught me.. haha.. while learning, i managed to cycle with ben holding onto the bike and poor him, i kept screaming while he kept asking me to look straight... but he quite got patience though.. lol.. after that i tried again and again and he stood on my left to catch me if i fall.. in the end, i did fall and cut my toe and slipper broke cause he didn't manage to catch me in time.. not his fault though.. haha.. so went back to the chalet to clean up and those at the chalet were like, omg, marianne, wad happen to your toe?? our finance tutor was there too btw.. so ben washed and cleaned my wound for me.. so nice of him rite? now you know why i say my class guys are so sweet and nice.. i'll miss having lessons with them.. even though me, ben, shaun and melvin doing the same electives.. and hopefully, we'll end up in the same class then at least still can study with them.. :) owells.. wonderful and precious memories of them, of 2B01.. i'll miss the times i had with them.. all i can hope for is be in the same class as those 3 guys! if according to what melvin said is true.. :) anyway, pics up tmr or some other time.. tired now.. off to bed soon.. good night peeps..

back from chalet not too long ago.. showered, sorted some matters with mum and now i'm here.. i eventually decided to go and keep yong sing and desheng company this afternoon since i was so bored at home.. melvin was there when i reached.. but i was talking to nicole for a while before i met them.. and yong sing is so nice to give me directions on how to get there.. thanks dude! p.s: i think we're better friends than before... :) so played cards with them for an hour or so and they kept 'bullying' me.. hell them but they're fun to be with.. keely and kai hui came and we continued slacking and playing cards till shaun and fellicia finally came before going for dinner.. had macs and was smsing nicole and stuff.. headed to ehub's NTUC to get snacks and drinks before they went back to the chalet while i came back home.. and what touched me tonight was 2 guys actually insisted that i go back early cause it was late and i was going back alone and that i sms them when i reached home.. so sweet, rite? ok, it may not mean much but still, someone actually said that to me when i'm the one saying it to people most of the time.. especially when someone sends me home.. owells.. will be going down earlier tmr? shall wake up early, shower, watch tv and once the chicken wings are done marinating (credits given to mum), i'm out of the house and will be home rather late tmr nite.. dun think i'll leave there early but yah.. my worries were unnecessary.. lol.. owells.. think i'll be damn tired by tmr nite.. wed got to get some church stuff done, thursday get a good rest at home, friday busy day cause busy event.. lol.. what a fun-filled week!! :) good, i can get tire out and fall asleep easily and not think of him...

i'm super duper tired.. once my hair dries, i'm off to bed.. have been awake since 7.30a.m this morning till now.. church in the morning.. will confirm stay on in primary 2 next year and i think it's confirmed that i'll be level rep next year as well? that's what auntie nancy said when auntie evelyn asked if we could all move up to primary 3 with the class.. but one reason why i'm not moving cause pat is there.. i'd rather stay in primary 2 than move to primary 3 cause we won't get along.. and primary 2 is short of catechists.. haha..

after church was outing with nicole... headed down to bugis, lunched, walked from bugis to haji lane to arab street to lavender, bused to city hall, walked from city hall to marina square to suntec city before going home.. took some pictures but will only get them after nicole completes her A levels in one month's time? so be patient.. haha.. i'll upload pics for you all but not now, i guess... was tired so i slept for a while in the train.. reached home not 10 mins and i was out for dinner.. hui yee smsed and asked to see if me and nicole wanted to meet her for dinner at simpang.. but we didn't meet in the end.. if she smsed earlier, i would have agreed... haha... now i'm deciding whether or not to go for chalet day 1 tmr.. a bit lazy but i don't wanna go for neighbourhood mass sia.. but even then, i'll go but won't stay over.. cause if i stay, i got to go home on tuesday to pick up the chicken wings.. so no point.. might as well go home.. 2nd day also most prob go home bah after the bbq.. won't be too late though.. gotta come home and slowly start preparing for friday's event and complete my theory homework for piano.. i can only say busy week ahead..

anyway, on another note, i didn't see him today.. good and bad thing, i feel.. good cause at least i won't have negative feelings.. bad cause i somehow wished i saw him.. but like what i told nicole, i never see him doesn't mean he didn't see me.. of course, provided that he was in church lah.. lol.. owells.. i dunno.. i just saw his pic on J's friendster.. i somehow wanted to talk to him.. but nope, marianne shall restrain herself! lol.. nicole dropped hint to me.. i hope he'll keep his word.. not sure if friday night i'll see him.. it'll all depends.. even then, if he's in church helping with 1st recon, i'll be busy so may not get to talk to him or see him even if he does see me.. and i think he may help out at FHC?? somehow, i hope he do.. i'm contradicting myself, ain't i? haha.. lol.. i dunno lah.. confused.. blur.. unsure.. i hope we won't play hide-and-seek with each other if he's in church on friday and sunday.. :)

although my msn says...
let's play hide-and-seek...
i don't wanna play with you..
at all...

i slept my fill! woke up for piano after that came home and continued sleeping till 12.45pm.. shiok! haha.. maybe cause i didn't eat anything then still feel so sleepy.. now, i'm wide awake le.. talking to sherlyn online! haha.. last night didn't go simpang in the end.. was in church till 10 plus before cabbing home with the sisters.. haha.. slacking away at home again today till evening.. most prob going out for dinner but have no idea where.. lol..

tmr will be out with nicole.. seems we'll be going to arab street that area which is near little india there? she wanna go check out some cheap vintage clothings.. for me, i'll think i'll do window shopping.. haha.. hui yee and caroline has yet to confirm they're coming.. hopefully they say ok! so i'll be out the whole day tmr.. gotta sleep early and wake up early tmr to shower before going to church.. haha.. oh! and sweet nicole gave a hint just now.. that hint just made me smile.. and i tot i got the hint wrong lah.. but she was rather random? like suddenly just say 7 is a nice number.. haha.. some people will know what 7 would mean to me lah.. haiz.. although it was sweet of nicole to tell me, i somehow feel i rather not know cause i'll get affected and start thinking too much.. owells.. a step at a time, i guess... lol.. dun think i'll be bumping into him tmr.. since for the past few weeks he's been going on saturdays.. maybe caroline will see him.. but not me.. ok, shan't think too much.. off to do my favourite pastime now - videos! haha.. :)

-edited-
i've finished watching one of the HK dramas that i was following online.. peeps, any nice HK dramas? haha.. owells.. caroline smsed me just now and said that he wasn't in church.. does that mean he'll be in church tmr? i dunno and i dun wanna hope.. cause hoping will make me disappointed if it's not the outcome i want.. while having dinner just now, this particular thought came to mind.. actually even if he's my mr right, i have this feeling that we won't be together till most prob after his 'O' levels.. that's how i feel.. he just gives me this feeling.. i'm not sure if i'm wrong to feel this way but.. ok, too much thoughts about him tonight.. this shouldn't be the case.. but i know that if i do see him in church tmr, i won't deny that i'll be happy but my mood, my feelings may turn the other way round after that.. shopping tmr with nicole.. :)

having problems sleeping again.. not sure why.. just feel tired but can't fall asleep.. ahh!! maybe cause of P2's 1st recon night coming up next week.. can be said as an annual big event? and whatsmore this year, i'm not like the others, stationed in church.. i'll be assisting auntie nancy and auntie tina so i'll be all over church.. according to auntie nancy, i'm undergoing training for level rep.. does that mean next yr i'm most prob likely to become level rep? owells.. so i'm somehow playing a big big big role this year.. and if you wanna say undergo training, my training started in june, after i took over nat in taking minutes.. haha...

anyway, off to church in another 2 1/2 hrs.. going in a little earlier so that i can settle some things rgd next week and see if the P3 needs help.. busy busy busy yet bored bored bored.. haha... after that, may or may not be meeting nicole already.. that girl ahh... so depending on her mood and energy level on whether she can still hang on for a few more hours and whether she's willing to come down to church and meet me.. haiz... owells.. shan't blame her.. hmmm... dunno whether the altar boys will be helping tonite? if they are, will he be there? i dunno.. but i doubt they're helping..

nicole said she'll find out when n levels end.. i told her no need already.. cause no matter how much i may wish to know, after knowing it will result in more hope and then eventually more hurt.. so i'd rather not know but self-deceive myself... owells.. letting nature take its course.. what's more important is that i'm happy.. agree? lol.. :)

-edited-
my mood's feeling good tonight.. not because i saw him... on the contrary, i thought i would see him when i saw the other altar boys but phew, he wasn't there.. you must be wondering why i'm glad that i didn't see him when i should be feeling otherwise.. well, he's not there would allow me to not think so much.. and my mood won't get affected.. so i guess for now, it's best that i don't see him.. i'm trying not to think about him or contacting him.. shall just wait and see after his exams (which i don't know when that ends..).. owells.. been feeling irritated and stuff the last few days.. people put me on aeroplane which after a while, puts me off.. argh.. owells.. hopefully the meet on sunday will go as planned... :S

我不懂你的心..
心在痛, 眼泪倒流..
有时候真的好累..
想不再回头..

some changes made to my blog.. new layout, new blog address.. more privacy against unwanted people.. such that, it's not being made private but not many know my new blog address.. only those on my links and my darlings.. haha.. i guess it is really more privacy, huh?

anyway, i applied for an admin post at orchard.. dunno whether i'll get the job and whether i'll decide to take up but at least i applied.. beats having staying at home, rotting away.. but at the thought that it's at orchard just makes me feel so sian.. super sian.. imagine working every day at orchard.. lol.. but owells.. shall see how when the person call me bah? after all, even if call, i may decide to decline the job.. next week's chalet.. doubt i'll stay over.. dunno whether tracy is free or not on monday.. if she is, most prob we'll go cycling at pasir ris and maybe i'll drop by and see them.. i think they'll 'kill' me if i don't stay lah.. haha.. owells.. busy week next week? with chalet and my dear little kids' 1st recon night on friday, busy night, busy week.. lol.. there's the last meeting tonite and tmr's the P3 penitential service.. wonder if altar boys are asked to help.. if so, will he be there? and what about P2 1st recon? ok, i'm supposed to stop thinking about him.. but sometimes can't be helped.. he was on my mind last night and that teachers' day incident just played in my mind.. but i'm getting on fine, with lesser feelings of emo for sure.. lol.. :)

*edited:
most prob be simpang-ing tmr night with nicole after P3 event.. have yet to ask mum but i think it should be ok.. cause i don't intend to stay out till very late.. most likely at most 1 1/2 hours? cause i've got piano the next day and nic's out the whole day and the P3 event will get me tired.. so just a drink or dessert with her, some chats and home sweet home.. owells.. but there's cats!! as in meow meow.. argh!! nic's not scared of cats, i think so she'll be able to protect me.. am thinking of asking someone else but i know nic is sure to scream at me if i ask.. so i think i'd better not ask.. but i know how to get to simpang already.. have asked clare so shouldn't be a problem.. ok, i'm so tired after P2 CATS meeting.. need to get things done tmr afternoon b4 going to church... owells.. off to bed early tonite... :)

if you didn't become my eye candy..
if i hadn't come to know you...
maybe, just maybe...
all these wouldn't have happened..

got back results already.. i think this semester's subjects are not easy.. so taking that into consideration, i can get all Bs and 1 B+, i'm happy.. at least i didn't fail.. and yes, my MBS got B!! unexpected surprise.. :) as for GPA.. i will only know tmr.. tried counting but it didn't seem correct.. so yah.. as for the girls, they did pretty well!! GOOD JOB FRENS!! happy for them and for myself.. hopefully my GPA (cumulative) don't get affected badly.. next semester, i'm going to chiong again.. after all, i can finally concentrate on core subjects since there is no more CDS.. easier to manage time as well!! and now that we've got back results, i'm hoping me and sherlyn to end up in the same class.. will we? haha.. we won't know till a month or so later.. owells..

and since i've got good results or rather, i'm happy with my results, shopping this sunday with nicole and maybe with caroline and hui yee!! yeah!! i'm so going shopping with nicole and do some catching up this sunday.. seems i'll be out from morning till night with her!! :) and i so hope the other 2 dearies can make it.. pls say you can, ok! don't put me on aeroplane le lah.. so difficult to meet you up.. haha..

*edited:
after reading my god-sis's blog, i've got the intention of changing my blog address. should i? any suggestions? hmm... owells.. but, i've then got to inform everyone about the change in blog address.. how? should i? maybe i should.. can get more privacy from unwanted people.. poly frens will know who i'm talking about.. haha.. lol.. and stupid msn can't sign me in.. argh!!

good grades..
good results..
contented and happy..
what more can i ask for?

after so long, i've 'waken up'.. heeding caroline's advice.. to stop thinking so much.. i agree with her.. think so much, i suffer, he doesn't know anything.. why bother? so yah, i'll try to stop thinking about him.. and like what i told nicole, i shall see how it goes when he contacts me.. if i contact him, the emo feelings will arise and blah blah blah.. and cause i'm listening to caroline's advice, it's my risk of bearing whatever the outcome cause you make a choice to follow somebody's advices for you and following that choice comes risk.. agree? haha.. a special thanks to caroline and nicole! u darlings are the best frens i can ever ask for.. and i hope hui yee is ok.. drop me a msg or call if you're not ok, ok dear?

talking about frens, i realised i've not been keeping contact with sue and sam and char and many more.. from KC, the only few people are tracy, hui yee, nic, caroline.. guess it's time for the party girl to hold a christmas party or new year's party this year so that we all can do some bonding and gathering! agree darlings? haha.. i know they would agree with me.. lol.. ok, more updates tonite if there's anything for me to edit.. haha..

omg! tmr's wednesday..
day of release of exam results thru sms...
hope i fare well..
while i wait for you to contact me..
i'll try to stop thinking about you..

Love Me No More

I toss and turn in bed
Can't get you out of my head
Even though you're so far away...
I need you here with me
Oh boy why can't you see
That i can't live without your love

When i close my eyes, i think of you
I wish i had you here with me
But there's nothing i can do

Counting everyday that goes by
And the tears that i cry
You don't wanna love me no more
Wish that you could hold me tonight
I'm hurting inside
Cause you don't wanna love me no more
Cause you don't wanna love me no more, no more

I tried to call your phone
But you ain't been at home
I need to find out where you are
So i can make you see that you belong to me
For me there is no other love

When i close my eyes
I think of you
I wish i had you here with me
But there's nothing i can do

Counting everyday that goes by
And the tears that i cry
You don't wanna love me no more
Wish that you could hold me tonight
I'm hurting inside
Cause you don't wanna love me
Cause you don't wanna love me no more

All i know is that i can't live without you
But i wanna know what made you feel this way
I'll be right here for you
And everything that you do
But how can i get this close to you
When you don't feel the way i do

Counting everyday that goes by
And the tears that i cry
You don't wanna love me no more
Wish that you could hold me tonight
I'm hurting inside
Cause you don't wanna love me
Cause you don't wanna love me no more

*edited:
it's night.. and is raining.. feeling emo enough.. now with the rain, i'm even more emo.. i so badly need a chat...

is my situation the same as what the lyrics has stated?
but i like the lyrics a lot...
but how can i get close to you
when you don't feel the way i do??

big commotion last night.. thought i could blog abt church and stuff but no... that damn sis forgot to close the window before leaving for TM and i thought she closed it.. it started raining and when i got home, i had the biggest shock of my life.. my whole laptop was wet.. my precious laptop was wet.. how nice.. tried drying it and turning on but no, it didn't work.. was quite upset that i started crying and the parents weren't of any help.. they just kept saying that i should have closed the window even if i wasn't the last to leave the room and that i should take proper care of my laptop.. like hell... the sister is so pampered that they don't think she's at fault too.. so was quite upset, cried, smsed nicole and hui yee and ended up talking to hui yee on the phone for more than 1 hour.. but it was nice chatting with her although we seeked consolation in each other because of our problems.. these people can really make me smile and feel better.. :)

anyway, was in church yesterday.. met caroline up... chatted a little before going up to class.. caroline said she thought she saw him if she didn't see wrongly.. haha.. owells.. i didn't see him yesterday.. but i'm not sure if God answered my prayers.. good weather or unexpected happening.. well, there was good weather in the afternoon and something unexpected happened.. so did God answer my prayers? i really don't know.. regarding him, me and nicole chatted a lot on this.. and sometimes i ask myself, ain't i foolish to worry and be anxious about him when we aren't together.. why am i bothering myself with such worries? i really have no answer.. or maybe i do but it could be self-denial.. nicole said maybe it's best for me not to see him now.. but even if i don't see him, i think about him and that subjective matter and yes, the emo-ness comes.. but i shall try.. i foresee that my coming posts for the next few days will be rather emo and sad? lol.. owells.. i'm feeling damn tired now.. slept for less than 5 hours last nite thanks to the coffee drink i had for dinner.. maybe i shall sleep a while later.. haha.. ok, off to do my stuff.. updates tonite if possible (and if nothing goes wrong..) :)

*edited:
chats with the darlings... been giving advices and they've been giving me advices.. i dunno wad to do now.. just like what caroline just said, she's giving me advices all because she doesn't want to see me suffer and suffer when he doesn't know anything.. haiz.. i really dunno lah.. at a loss.. and i'm promising them not to think so much.. but it's always easier said than done.. but i know if i can keep myself busy and occupied, i eventually can think lesser and stress myself out lesser.. owells.. i really dunno.. darlings, what shld i do other than wait??

were those answers just pure coincidence?
or are they the answers that God wants to tell me?
i'm at a loss now...
will you tell me what to do?

will be going back to church later to help auntie tina's class again cause auntie jane's not back yet.. so off to church.. can't get caroline.. dunno if she wanna meet me before mass to talk for awhile or not.. well, hopefully she does.. then can sit in the foyer and chat and maybe see him.. :S but i'm not holding high hopes.. if God wants us to meet, we will meet.. of course, i'm so hoping to see him today cause i won't be attending mass tmr.. and because i'm not attending mass tmr, i'd rather see him today than miss the chance of seeing him tmr.. if you get what i mean? owells.. and i so hope caroline reply my phone call.. most prob out for dinner with the sisters tonite but it's not confirmed.. i dun wanna eat alone.. make me feel so poor thing.. and emo.. at least with their company, it'll be a bit better.. owells.. more updates tonite.. after i get back from church and dinner... :S

was on the phone for about an hour last night with nicole. had a nice chat with her. but we weren't chatting about the past or about school. we were talking about our problems. she consoled me and i consoled her. she counselled me and i counselled her. and this chat made the both of us emo and for me, i felt some terrible feelings. the same feelings i felt when i quarreled with the yr 1 crush at the beginning of this year. i think only year 1 frens will know who's this year 1 crush i'm talking about. not convenient to mention who is it cause i'm not sure if anyone from class still reads this. the same feelings that made me hurt and the urge of crying yet cry without tears. nicole asked if his reply to me affected me. if his acad status affected me or was it just the 'talk to you another time' reply. i felt it wasn't his acad status but more of the 'talk to you another time' reply. maybe i shouldn't have smsed him but if i didn't, i never knew how long i had to wait. but now i know. after his exams. and can i say i hope his exams end next week? at least i have a higher chance of having a happy face for class chalet. but nevertheless, the chat made me feel better.

i had my reasons for wondering how come mr chan told him about me. ok, if you tell me it's normal for mr chan to tell him that he saw me without knowing i knew him, maybe i still can accept. but to the extent that he asked if i was wearing a white shirt that day? i really have my reasons. and i want to know the answer to my questions. tried asking mr chan last nite but he was off to sleep. maybe tonite. it's just the curious side of me. or is it better not to know the answer at all?

overall, feeling better today. not so emo. but still, those thoughts still run in my mind and his replies. i guess it's the night thing, just like what i told nicole. it's the night thing. after 11pm, when the streets are almost quiet. when the house is quieten down. thoughts would run wild. guess i'll still be emo the next few days till he calls me back. i never know. but one thing i'm glad is that i have nicole and nicole have me for company over the next few days. i know i can always confide in her. she was, she is and she will always be my confidant, my zhi xin peng you. :) and i realised i've been talking to secondary school mates a lot these few days. just love those dearies. :)

i'm glad i have you as company..
i know you'll always be there for me..
whenever i need a listening ear..
thanks dear!

just got back from church not too long ago.. meeting went well.. not too bad.. and i learnt quite a bit on how to allocate duties and making sure that everyone has a duty and the flow of procedure for 1st Recon night itself.. and i've been assigned to assist auntie tina.. cause according to auntie nancy, she sounded sure that i'll be level rep next year and this year, i can learn from auntie tina as she 'imparts some of her skills' to me.. well, taking it as a learning experience.. and you know what? it has always been my wish to 'get promoted' and be level rep.. but after hearing what auntie nancy had said, i really don't know to be happy or sad.. level rep.. next year.. well, if God wants me to be the level rep, i guess HE has his plans and HE knows what's best for me.. but like what i've said, taking it as a learning experience.. maybe it's not a bad idea to be level rep, afterall..

*edits:
heeded her advice and smsed him.. but i guess he was busy studying cause his last msg was '... talk to you another time.' well, maybe he is busy.. owells.. i guess he won't be free till 1-2 weeks later which also means i dun think i'll see him online or get to talk to him for another 1-2 weeks.. maybe during this period, i shouldn't think too much.. like how i adviced her.. and i seeked her advice on that matter which i've been figuring out since sunday... she said it's rather subjective.. i guess so too.. i just hope i'm not thinking too much.. like how she can't wait for one month to be over, for me now, i can't wait for the next 1-2 weeks to be over.. at least i think he'll get back to me.. :S

having doubtful hopes now...
having little regrets now...
maybe i shouldn't have did that...
but since i did what i did,
at least i know i won't hear from you..
till 1-2 weeks later..

is it me or is the system just lagging today? everything seem to be loading damn slow today.. anyway, gonna watch my videos later so i thought i'd better blog first, in case i watch until very late.. so was out with mum today to bugis for lunch at siam kitchen before walking over to lavender to do some shopping and errands! i can only say, today was a fruitful day for me and mum cause we bought clothes and i got my jumper fixed.. mum paid for my clothes.. well, every time we go to the supplier, mum would pay for my clothes! and today my clothes plus 2 belts from bedok inter came up close to $70! and i'm happy with the things i bought and mum's happy with hers.. :) and this was what i bought: 2 sweaters (grey and black), 1 denim dress and 2 belts! and out of all these, i love the dress the most! i can wear it for presentations in school! and any of my new belts can go along with it.. here are the pics:


my 2 new sweaters! can wear it for school.. like it cause the sleeves are super long.. can keep me warm when the aircon or the weather is super cold! :)


my 2 new belts! white and black! mum paid for it.. can go with my new dress.. easy to match with my clothes too! :)


and lastly, my new denim dress! love it! set my eyes on it when i entered the shop and i told mum... just so lovely!! :D

in all, i love my shopping spree today! and it's not that often that i get to go shopping with mummy especially when she's paying for me! anyway, on another note, mum said my face looks better! as in lesser pimples.. or little pimples! and i so agree!! hmm.. looks like the rice flour powder is working.. hopefully, the pimples on my back clear as well.. then i can wear tube or halter for chirstmas this year! haha.. ok, off to watch my HK shows and have dinner! toodles!! :)

seldom seen you online these days..
been busy?
wanting to sms you..
yet afraid you're busy..
or find me a nuisance..
decided it was best to wait for your call or sms...

spent my day at home slacking.. lol.. the weather didn't make me feel like going out.. rain rain rain.. will make me feel blue sooner or later.. haha.. but as i was at home, i started getting down to reading my book.. and talking about reading, this holiday, i hope to finish my book.. hopefully i can.. lol.. i need to get addicted to reading.. then at least, i've got something to do.. haha... will be going out tmr with mum to fix my jumper.. so won't be at home in the afternoon and hopefully, tmr will be a nice sunny day! :) anyway, here are the photos that were taken when i met angeline on friday at k box..


that's my birthday cake.. coffee flavour.. bought by my bestie, angeline..


making a birthday wish.. can you guess what i'm wishing? maybe you can.. haha..


and lastly, that's my bestie! been ages since i last went out with her alone... will be meeting more often this holiday, i guess?? together with my KC dearies! they know i miss them lots!! :)

another day has passed...
not a phone call or sms...
maybe you shouldn't have said those things...
or maybe i just shouldn't get my hopes too high...
cause i know we won't have any ending..

thanks to all ur concerns! i'm better already.. a lot better as compared to saturday and sunday.. lol.. was talking to hui yee last nite and that girl kept chasing me to go and sleep.. in the end, i only went offline at 12 plus.. bleah.. lol.. but anyway, had a great sleep but 2 stupid msgs from yong sing woke me up at 4.30a.m!! 4.30 am in the morning! really starting to think that he's an owl.. lol.. anyway, cause i was sick, i didn't really enjoy the singapore flyer.. hopefully i'll have another chance to go up there again, either with family or with frens.. and on the way to dinner, someone called and made me smile.. i seriously didn't expect that phone call but it came and i smiled.. it made me feel better.. :) anyway, here's the family photos that we took yesterday on the flyer.. pardon me cause i wasn't exactly smiling..

and the following pics were some pics taken when my overseas cousins were in singapore for their holiday!

and the last pic was taken during my holiday at penang in june.. just managed to get these pics from my sister recently..

more updates maybe tonight.. if not, till the next post!! :) enjoy the 'not-so-recent' pics!!

*edits:

ever since you said you'll give me a call or an sms when you're free, i've been looking and checking my phone every now and then, for fear i could have missed your call or sms.. and now, every time my phone rings, be it an sms or a call, i hope it's your number i see... owells.. leaving it to fate...

certain things, certain people...

is just able to put a smile on my face...

be it knowingly or unknowingly...

and you belonged to the group of certain people...

i really hate the feeling of being sick.. i tend to get all so emotional and tear at every single bit.. just hate it especially when i'm down with fever and just feel like sleeping all day.. and what's making it worse is, i think my period's coming.. i'm getting those small stomach cramps.. haiz.. and on a rainy day, it's best to stay home and sleep..

going out soon.. off to sit on the singapore flyer.. there's no sense of excitement from me cause the reasons have just been stated.. how nice.. my mood is just being spoilt.. anyway, on a happy note, i received a teacher's day present! from one of the kids in class.. she was just so sweet.. really appreciate the thought.. and yes, i'm a teacher. not a full-time one though. a relief teacher is also a teacher. teaching catechism in church, and being known to the kids as 'i'm your catechism teacher..' is also a teacher.. so yah, i get to celebrate teachers' day.. :)

this leads to a sudden reflection.. actually i feel teachers' day is not just meant for full-time teachers... everyone is a teacher in one way or another.. so we all should celebrate teachers' day.. to one and all, HAPPY TEACHERS' DAY!!! :)

haiz.. sick again.. went to the doctor this morning and had to cancel piano lesson.. down with bad throat that hurts a lot resulting in a slight cough, slight fever and a dripping nose.. my immune system truly sucks this year.. my throat hurt badly last night that i woke up, drank water and took a pill but it didn't seem to work.. this morning just didn't feel like talking and was feeling weak.. so mum said to cancel piano.. how nice.. -.-

anyway, was home at 11 last night.. was super tired cause i woke up early yesterday morning to go back KC with hui yee.. was fun.. had fun.. i missed the days in KC.. with hui yee yesterday, we kept reminiscing those KC days and the jokes and laughter we had.. saw some teachers and they still remembered us which was very sweet of them.. haha.. after that, we went to marina square to do window shopping and had sakae sushi buffet.. totally fun and enjoyable with my best dearie! she was so sweet and because we were troubled over our last papers, we cheered each other up as well with the joke of the day and the many laughters from KC days.. gosh, i really do missed KC.. so many things there that are just so unforgettable and so memorable.. the friendships forged there.. i miss my KC dearies.. they know who they are.. :)

after that was k box with angeline at ehub.. was late and felt so paiseh but tha girl planned a whole lot of surprises and yes, i was touched! many thanks to my dear best pal.. she's one of the best fren i can ever have in poly.. and i know her present for me wasn't cheap.. but i love it lots and she knew it! yesterday was totally a splendid day!! just enjoyed the company yesterday especially during the day!

going out to church at 3.45p.m.. meeting another KC dearie at 4.. and talking about them, i've been meeting quite a number of KC dearies recently.. and some of which i haven seen for a very long long long time.. after church is auntie allyson's house-warming.. gosh, i think i'll be damn tired.. and i'd better bring extra tissue paper.. i foresee my nose wun stop dripping.. lol.. ok, i'm off to play games!!

hui yee dear,
more outings this holidays, yeah??
we have to meet up more often!!
and i just wanna say your fren is 24/7 available..
for you and the other KC dearies..
and dun think too much..
things will turn out fine!
u know my hotline..
just give me a call..
alright, hao peng you?? :)

haiz.. we've got another catechist stepping down... lynette's stepping down as catechist (and i guess, level rep..??) due to poor health.. oh my, we're missing many catechists already.. and now with 2 level reps gone, we're short of catechists... but does that mean my chances of being level rep is higher? hmm.. i dunno.. God has his plans! :)

anyway, on a happy note! EXAMS ARE FINALLY OVER!!!! out of the 3 papers, i screwed MBS big time.. like seriously.. unlike HR and finance where although i had a little mental block, i was still able to write logical answers.. but for MBS?? gosh! i had a bad mental block and i couldn't remember all that i studied.. i still hope i pass the paper with my not-so-correct but maybe logical answers.. and preferably still get a B+ overall.. ok, i dun foresee any As this sem.. how nice.. =.= but nevertheless, exams are over! shall enjoy myself now and worry when the results are released in 2 weeks' time.. yong sing left a msg for me last on msn saying that they'll celebrate my birthday for me during chalet.. how nice of them.. i hope i get a surprise!! :)

parkway just now with caroline and nicole! it was nice catching up with them.. haha.. totally awesome!! will most likely be seeing caroline on saturday (and maybe monday??) and nicole on monday.. got to continue helping her with her econs.. i hope she'll do well with my notes.. in all, i had fun with them today! :)

tmr is outing day! will be out from morning till night.. KC with hui yee in the morning followed by lunch and window shopping till early evening before going to pasir ris.. k box at night after that.. the buffet one! so looking forward to those two events tmr.. and you know wad? i'll be eating sushi the whole of tmr.. how nice! :) haha.. ok, more edits maybe tonite..

i totally have no mood to study MBS already.. i'm halfway on my way to holiday mood already... this is sooo bad... and tmr's the last paper and it's in the morning.. haiz.. and i predict i'll have a big problem getting up tmr, which means i've got to sleep early tonight.. and hopefully i can fall asleep.. lol...

tmr after MBS paper will be the start of my holidays.. whee!! this week is full already.. looking forward to my dates with my dearies and my bestie.. tmr is library date with nicole and caroline.. going back to KC on friday for teachers' day celebration with hui yee followed by lunch and shopping? and den k box at night.. haha.. fun-filled day!!! :) and after exams tmr, i've got lots of errands i wanna do.. deposit money, arrange dates with dearies and besties and class chalet! so many things to look forward this holiday!! people, it's time to party!!

to xiao min, yee sin, sherlyn, DJ etc: next week we go out, k?? u all go plan and let me know!! and dun miss out anyone!!
to tracy: we must meet more often this holiday, k? and to start it off, it's our cycling lesson next week! and maybe we can go sun-tanning again on sentosa.. :) love you dear girl! and you're being missed..

3 papers...
2 down...
1 to go...

and i'm looking forward to saturday...
cause i may see you... :)

HR paper today.. not too bad.. i think i did pretty ok for the case study and essay questions except for a little blunder here and there.. finance after that with xiao min at home.. she came over, slacked and back to work... just finished dinner and i stink! haha.. shall go take a shower as soon as i finished typing this post.. i missed sherlyn and DJ man! haven seen them for a week.. and the moment we saw each other, the noise level went up! haha.. that was how loud we were, on just deciding where to have lunch.. will be lunching at home instead tmr.. at least i will have time to do one more practice paper even though i may not complete it.. but nevertheless, it's always worth doing it cause you never know what will come out.. ok, i'm off to the shower.. it's lovely to have a night shower!! cause it's sooo relaxing!!! :)

3 papers...
1 down...
2 to go...
gambatte everyone!!

i miss talking to you..
will you be online tonight??

exams officially start tmr for me! gosh.. how time flies.. i've completed all topics for all subjects already!! good or bad? haha.. but will still do my revision for the next few papers the day before.. to all, happy mugging!! bear with it for another 3 more days! it'll be over in a flash!! :)

my start of the holiday has started to be filled with activities.. or rather, at least till the end of this week... thursday after MBS paper, i'm out till evening(?) with nicole and caroline.. accompanying them to study at marine parade library.. shall help them with econs since i studied that last sem and think i didn't fare that badly... will need to dig up my notes from my box..you know, having not seen nicole for more than a year and only seeing caroline once every few months, i so treasure the times when we can meet, especially when they have their A levels this year.. friday is dinner with bestie!! saturday is church day.. auntie tina needs me to help her with the class so i said ok since exams are over, i've got nothing to do at home and i may meet him, so why not? after all, i've giving word that i would help out on saturdays if i'm free.. after that is house-warming party at mum's fren's place.. sunday is church day again! church till afternoon, followed by rest time at home and then off to the Singapore Flyer in the evening and then dinner! gosh, this week seems to be filled with activities from thursday onwards and i'm sooo looking forward to it!! after that, it's time to pick up the phone and ask people like TRACY and hui yee out for shopping and meals!! gosh, hopefully, my holidays will be filled and will be spent fruitfully! hear that, girls from poly?? haha! we'll still hang out during the holidays, rite?! haha.. ok, i'm off to wait for dinner and to do my HR paper! :)

a million thanks to all who remembered my birthday! :) thanks to nicole, who was the first to wish me.. thanks to caroline, tracy, sherlyn, ben, kelly, desheng, xiao min, yee sin, DJ, ting and fiona.. thanks for remembering ur fren's special day as she turned a year older! thanks to my lovely P2 kids, who sang a birthday song to me as i entered class upon returning from CATS office.. they were so sweet and i nearly cried (although after that, they got me a little angry cause of their craftwork.. but that's not the main issue..) thanks to my two lovely partners, auntie evelyn and auntie teresa for their well-wishes.. thanks to the parents' frens who wished me when at dinner just now.. and lastly, thanks to my family.. if it wasn't for them, i would not have been here, being who i am today, supporting me in my decisions and giving me those invaluable advices.. of course the most important thanks goes to the woman who was in labour 18 years ago, who went through much pain and suffering to bring this little child, now 18, to this world.. thank you mummy! :) of course, someone very close to me has yet to wish me.. i hope she remembers.. haha.. once again, a million thanks to all of you! and i can now proudly say: I AM FINALLY 18!! OF LEGAL AGE!! ;)

a post on the past and this friendship which i treasured a lot.. i met this very good fren of mine from secondary school just now at parkway.. this fren.. she went through a lot with me.. how we met in primary 6 when she was my junior since she only became a prefect in primary 6.. at the end of the year, i thought, ok, that was it.. just a hi-and-bye fren.. but no! we slowly became the best of frens when we ended up in the same class in sec 1.. same group and we started our 'class family'.. where hui yee was the grandma, she was the grandma's sister and i was the maid cause i was often bullied by them and yet continued to help them buy drinks and collect their homework as i was sitting in front.. and i would remember the time when she got scolded by mr lee cause of her maths book.. she went to the toilet to cry and we were all rather worried for her cause she didn't seem the kind to cry.. after that incident, she hated mr lee like nuts! haha! but then again, everyone in class didn't really like him esp when he was our maths and pe teacher..

in sec 2, i wanted to sit behind her so that she could help me since she was very good in maths and smart.. but no, i ended up sitting in a different grp but still continued buying drinks for her during recess and that year, i became the tissue woman.. still remembered the time when she wrote that stupid little 'marianne and *** sitting on the tree' song.. and that embarrassed me in front of the whole class.. luckily our teacher didn't see it cause i still remember that day it was raining so assembly was in class.. it made me real mad and i didn't talk to her the whole day even though the usual happenings still happened.. and she knew it and she apologised to me through friendster.. well, i'm not the petty type so we were back to normal after that although i did say i was angry with her.. sec 2 that yr, our friendship nearly broke down cause of an incident.. and it happened just before my birthday.. she however was still on my birthday party invitation list and i thought she was angry and wouldn'd turn up.. but the night of the party, she called and we made up and she came! that time, her partner had to act as a messenger btw us.. coming to think of it now, it was rather childish of us.. haha...

sec 3 we split class.. but we still attended core geog lectures tgt with the rest of the girls.. had fun cause we wld sit and talk and eventually get scolded by the teachers for being noisy.. lol.. and because we split class, we slowly stopped hanging out tgt yet we wld still keep in contact.. this continued till sec 4.. although now we are both busy with school work and since our timings are different, it's difficult to meet up.. yet we have each other on our mind and occasionally, she would send an sms or give a call and we wld chat.. sometimes, i would be the one doing it.. after all, in a friendship it's a give-and-take.. it's the same as being in a BGR.. no matter where we are, no matter what we're doing, i'll always remember the times i had with her.. the times where i would go over to her place to study and risk getting scolded by mum and she would cover up for me.. the times where i would go back with her tgt after school.. the times where she would use me as a cover whenever she was going out with boys and didn't want to let her mum know.. the times when i used her as a cover when i was going out with guys from my class.. and she would inform me beforehand and vice versa.. i will never forget this fren of mine.. she will always be the fren whom i will look for when i need a listening ear for very personal matters.. she will always be the one who i will provide her with a listening ear and a shoulder if she needs.. and this fren will always be placed the first few in my friends' ranking.. her name is NICOLE TAN.. :)

dear nicole,
if you ever need a listening ear...
or a shoulder to cry on..
always remember, that you've got a fren called Marianne..
she'll always be there for you..
love ya! :)

surprisingly, my progress everyday for studying seems to be good.. by evening, i'm done with my studying.. this of course excludes the finance paper which i have to do daily.. yet what worries me is i may have completed my daily to-do topics but have i really remembered what i've studied? hopefully, i don't forget everything that i've studied earlier on.. otherwise, it is just sooo bad and terrible.. and during this period of studying, i've helped friends out and they have helped me out as well.. me and ben, me and yee sin or me and xiao min.. helping to answer each other's questions and if unsure, asking other friends or Mr DHL aka yong sing.. haha.. he answered one qn that ben asked me and me nor xiao min couldn't answer.. grateful to him!! :)

over a period of time, certain friendships have changed.. the friendship between me and yong sing have been better and i guess, i would say stronger after we clarified things.. the friendships between me and the girls have also become stronger as they stood by me during my darkest periods.. but for some, the friendship is still there but maybe not like before.. yet i'm thankful for these friends! cause be it now or in the past, they've heard my woes and gave me advice.. they played a beautiful role in my life.. ok, no idea why i'm writing this.. maybe cause a new friendship was created through me.. so these reflections.. and i think i've been influenced by my younger sis.. to occasionally write bipolar things on my blog.. haha.. but that's life, isn't it? and i think i'm a pig.. a hungry pig.. i get hungry super easily these few days and it's always 2-3 hours after i had lunch.. does studying use up my energy so fast? like now, i'm hungry again.. guess i'm off to get food from downstairs.. gosh, i'd better exercise during the holidays! ok peeps, happy mugging!! ;)
*edits:
after so long, my eye candy finally added me on friendster!! made me so happy.. does this mean a good start as friends? lol.. nevertheless, i'm happy :)

i will get the answer that i want in 2 days...
will you be there??
i hope so..
and i want a happy birthday this year.. :)

hell, i clicked the wrong button and now, i have to retype everything again.. anyway, after much changes, xiao min and yee sin evetually came to study.. had fun with them from the time we confirmed that we're studying again to the time i saw xiao min off at the bus stop.. xiao min, dun worry, ur funny event is known only to me and yee sin!! haha.. but they're fun to be with.. exchanging notes and stuff, slacking, munching, piano and those emails.. great way to relax after the many days of hectic studying!! and talking about studying, i've yet to touch on my subjects for today.. hopefully i can complete studying at least 2 subjects by 11p.m.. otherwise i foresee another late night which i'm totally drained.. so i'd better jia you! anyway, after exams, i'm so going to enjoy and relax!! with sec sch frens like hui yee and tracy and with poly mates like xiao min, sherlyn and those from my current class.. okok, back to my 'best fren' aka my lecture notes.. ;) happy mugging frens!

as the songs play, track by track,
those beautiful memories play in my mind..
and yet amidst those beautiful memories,
i see your face..
and all i wanna say is..
i miss you...

i just had to blog abt this thing which i thought was amusing to me.. was just talking to ben and he went for the additional finance lesson today.. and when just after i asked him if many went, the next thing that popped into my head was 'I bet you missed me..'?? hahahaha... amusing huh? ok, maybe not.. lol.. just finished my macs.. and yes, i know i shouldn't be eating oily food but you know, when i'm alone at home and hungry, i can't be bothered.. haha.. ok, i'm off to bathe before carrying on with the last subject on my schedule - finance.. update tonight again! ;)

doctor visit today.. guess it really was mild gastric flu.. doctor said i wasn't badly dehydrated despite having the runs and vomiting.. so i guess more rest would do the body good.. dun worry, frens! the girl's fine.. :) was at home today, studying and resting and munching.. haha.. believe or not, despite my occasional stomach pains and the toilet visits, i still felt like eating.. but up to now, my stomach's feeling a lot better although it still hurts.. i shall rest more and cut down on my food intake.. frens have been telling me i've put on weight cause my face shows it all.. drats, this is just so bad.. although my face is rounder, makes me look 'cuter' but no, this is not right.. my weight has to be lost.. haha.. anyone keen on exercising during the hols after the exams?? haha..

my parents are back frm penang! love the shoes mum got me.. haha.. wearing those on sunday to match my jumper!! haha.. sunday's a special day for me.. just looking forward to it.. :) anyway, someone made me smile just now.. the feeling for him is just mutual.. we're just frens and really, our current relationship with each other is so much better than when i had feelings for him.. because occasionally, i'll receive smses frm him and these smses, although doesn't have much significance, always is able to put a smile on my face.. reason being, it's because we've cleared matters that's why he's smsing me just like frens.. if u understand what i mean.. it's not easy to explain but yah, i guess the point is there.. if i'm feeling better and i'm going to school tmr, i'll see him.. and the last sms he sent me was 'ok can. have a good rest then'... this just simply makes me smile.. to him, no other feelings.. just purely frens and i'm treating this friendship as one that will last forever.. he will definitely be on my wedding invitations when i get married one day.. :)

i wish the next message received on friendster...
is from you..
although i know..
it may never be..

i'm feeling out of sorts today.. not exactly my usual self.. and i can confirm one thing, he doesn't or seldom come to church on sunday to serve? cause he wasn't here today.. so caroline was right.. he attends the saturday mass.. but i wasn't that disappointed cause i expected it especially since i saw him yesterday during the 4.45pm mass. so yah.. but still, i just don't feel normal today.. maybe next week.. on that day that is special to me.. maybe i'll see him.. but like what i said, chances of me seeing him next week during the workshop is 70%.. lol... owells.. leaving it to GOD.. if God wants us to be friends, we'll eventually be frens.. but will it come true? i have no idea.. ok, i'm going back to my books.. got to complete 2 days worth of chapters.. jia you! perhaps more edits tonite.. :)

perhaps, perhaps, perhaps...
can this week pass fast
so that i can get an answer to what i'm looking forward for??

*edits:
my health system sucks to the core this year.. sick dunno how many times alr.. sore throat, stomach pain, minor surgery on my hand.. and now? i think i'm down with gastric flu.. diarrhea since wednesday and i started vomiting this evening.. argh!! most prob off to the doc tmr.. now is so badly not the time to fall sick but what is happening to me?? can't stand it.. however on the other hand, although my health system sucks, i made new guy frens.. be it those hi-and-bye frens or those who will stay with me till even after poly.. guys like melvin, ben etc.. those guys.. ok, i foresee those guys lah.. my tao hua yun not bad this year wor.. better than last year.. haha.. and more crushes and eye candies as well.. don't you think so? but nevertheless, no matter how good my tao hua yun is this year, they all still can't beat this group of people who have been through my rough patch and lent me their listening ear and who i always see everyday, be it rain or shine.. they are my family and my dearest frens!! ;)

all i wish..
is just a reply from you...

tired yet happy.. smiles all on my face this evening.. :) before i say the happy things, i'm so dead meat.. i didn't study a single bit today.. and i'm freaking tired.. looks like i'll have to study 2 days' load tmr.. :( this is bad.. no more going out till after exams.. it's really bad.. totally not following my study schedule..

anyway, on a happy note! i went to church today! helped out the 3pm class.. i think that class is better than my class but just as noisy.. at least they listen.. but maybe cause i'm a new face to them, that's why they behave better.. after the class, i was contemplating whether or not to go for the 4.45 mass and i smsed caroline.. after which, at 4.35pm, i decided to go so yup i went for mass!! but he wasn't serving.. somehow expected it since the 6pm mass would be some big celebration for the altar boys and he being one of the senior(?) would serve.. was a little disappointed but was prepared for such an outcome.. then halfway during mass, i saw him near the priests' house! obviously, he didn't see me lah! but i saw him!! and immediately, i started smiling.. haha.. cause it was so unexpected.. haha.. and he was indeed going to serve the 6pm mass cause he was holding his altar boy attire.. lol.. so a smile was put on my face.. out for dinner at bugis after church..

checked my friendster just now.. he last log in yesterday but he didn't reply my msg or add me.. owells.. maybe we're not fated to be friends.. but who knows? i'll most probably see him next sunday in the afternoon.. well, at least i'm 70% sure he'll be there.. cause the altar boys are in charge of church search.. so he'll most prob be there.. if chance allows, maybe i would talk to him.. maybe i won't.. will have to depend.. but nevertheless, he made me smile a little.. :) ok, i'm off to keep my good fren aka my lecture notes company.. night peeps!!

looking forward to it...
all i'm asking for is just to be friends...
and lastly, like everyone,
my notes have become my best fren for the next 1 wk or so...

as I heard the door lock this morning at 6.30a.m, I felt the house was suddenly so quiet.. and I suddenly thought of my eye candy.. haiz.. this is bad.. and I've got a bad feeling about this...

it will be more than just what it is now...

more edits tonite (if I'm not too tired...)

*edit:

just got home not too long ago.. feeling a little tired.. but still will have to carry on studying tmr.. will be going to church tmr afternoon.. not sure if after that still going out for dinner and/or movie or not.. well, if we are, maybe i may consider going for the 4.45 mass.. maybe can catch a few glimpses of him.. if not, i may just sit at the foyer and do my studying... but if we're not going out, then after the 3pm class, i'll come home.. no point wasting time in church.. anyway, dinner with angeline and the sisters was fun! enjoyed myself especially when we went to ehub to play arcade.. fun but i think i'll be aching tmr.. lol.. tired.. haha.. and i updated her on the eye candy as well.. haha.. well, another date with her but after exams.. :)

during dinner, i saw an sms from caroline!! gosh, after i saw the msg, i called her.. she saw him!!! ahh!! lol.. 'jealous' sia.. haha.. and according to her, he's not feeling well.. she saw him sniffing and coughing.. poor thing.. hope he get well soon.. haha.. and we were talking about tmr and stuff.. well, after knowing that tmr is St Pius's feast day, i think he will serve the 6.15pm mass tmr.. cause big event.. and his position in the altar boys ministry is quite high, i guess.. cause everytime those big masses, he's alwaes serving.. lol.. and caroline said smth which i tot was gross.. haha.. owells, if God wants me to meet him tmr, He will let me meet him tmr.. :) hmm.. i'm not sure if it's convenient to mention his name here but the way caroline addresses him to me is as if he's very close to us.. haha..

i think it will be more than just an eye candy...

many thoughts running through my head tonite.. after the meeting, after i got home.. by the 2nd half of the meeting, i wasn't mentally present alr.. but nevertheless, let me jot down my thoughts..

firstly, i'm like finally meeting angeline after donkey years!! like really!! meeting her tmr.. she's coming to my place after her driving first before deciding where we wanna go before dinner at seoul garden with steph and angel! so looking forward to it.. just talked to her on the phone.. so many things to update her about especially my new eye candy.. lol.. so excited.. tmr's the day!! :)

next, talking about my eye candy.. no, i din see him today.. he wasn't serving mass.. so yah.. but i'll be helping out in church on saturday.. during the 3pm lesson.. since the catechists for the 3pm class are relatively new.. so yah, i'll go in and may be learn from them how they handle the class.. and help them out with the confession drills.. and because of that, i may bump into him.. lol.. well, like what i told xiao min, on the surface it seems i'm helping out in church but main purpose is to maybe catch a few glimpses of him.. haha.. owells.. fate.. :)

third, i got my finance coursework grade and my HR project results.. i did better than what i expected for my finance coursework even though it could be a border-line case.. but because of that, i'm going to fight it out with finance and chiong finance.. hopefully my hard work will pay off and get at least a B overall.. as for HR project, we met our target!! well done peeps!! we did a lot better and jumped 2 grades!! quite happy.. overall for the project part, group plus individual, i got a B.. hopefully my coursework wun get affected badly by my mid-sem.. will call my tutor up tmr to check my coursework.. :)

lastly, i'm tired.. it's time to rest.. after all that chitter chatter and the thoughts, i'm tired.. more to talk about tmr with angeline.. more bitching around.. haha.. and of course, tell her more abt my eye candy! ok, tata.. off to dreamland.. night folks!! :)

I'm not going in to do relief teaching from now till end of exams.. cause i dun wan my GPA to drop.. so i'll be a good girl and stay home and study.. lol.. i turned down to teach today by the wae.. lol.. surprising huh? marianne turning down $65 just to study.. haha.. actually that wasn't totally the case.. my back was aching.. no idea why either when i didn't even do any exercise.. told mum this evening and after knowing where was hurting, she concluded that i could have sprained my back.. i can't even laugh too long.. poor me.. i hope the pain go away tmr.. :(

anyway, i'm not going for public speaking tutorial tmr.. 2nd time so it's just a warning email.. after all, it's the last lesson already.. so i'm coming home after finance lect or after lunch with the girls.. just as well.. i can come home and rest.. and maybe sleep for an hour or so.. lol.. going to church in the evening for mass.. wondering whether i'll see my eye candy? will he be there? lol.. we shall see tmr.. i think xiao min and sherlyn and caroline will receive sms from me if he's there.. haha.. :) after mass, there's CATS meeting.. i hope they won't end too late.. so i'll be dinner-ing in church.. poor me.. either at the foyer, CATS office or P2 classroom.. but i think most prob foyer after everyone leave.. so embarrassing to eat at the foyer when everyone is there.. or rather, mr eye candy seeing me have my dinner there.. or maybe i should change my mind and dine at the CATS office..?? lol.. shall see how tmr lah.. ok, i'm tired.. i hope i can sleep tonite.. slept well last night.. maybe cause it was cooling and i was tired from all that fun!! lol.. dun think i'll blog tmr.. see what time meeting end first.. till then, night peeps!! :)

crush or eye candy??
hmmm...
we shall see... :)

hahahahahahaha..... i just felt like laughing on a tuesday morning at 9.17a.m.. and i'm finding something unbelievable.. like seriously.. they don't find the eye candy good-looking.. they think *ahem* is better.. *rolls eyes* but haha... did my taste deproved again?? lol.. but in person, he really looks not bad and i still find his age unbelievable.. haha.. he just doesn't seem his age.. haha.. i seem to be in a good mood today.. haha.. just laughing away but this spells trouble for xiao min they all later.. they'll know why.. anyway, rgd my eye candy.. he hasn't add me on friendster nor reply my message.. well, hopefully he adds and yah, become friends.. lol.. no harm, right? ok, more when i get home this evening frm the sushi buffet with them.. :)

*edits:
back from that oh-my-goodness sushi buffet.. was already high during MBS lecture and super hungry.. not because i didn't eat lunch but i walked off my lunch when i went to Yu Neng to pass mum her specs.. and i was late somemore.. but my dear classmates were so nice to offer me a seat but i didn't sit with them anyway cause i spotted jean right in front.. but thanks to them! :) after MBS, i was soo hungry that i started going out of control.. was laughing and chatting with xiao min and sherlyn.. went to photocopy some notes b4 taking a cab down to CS for our sushi!!

had lotsa of fun and sherlyn was damn funny.. she almost ordered 3 sets of all the side dishes.. luckily me and xiao min stopped her.. in the end, we ordered 2 sets but we were dying, just trying to finish up that 2 sets of dunno-how-many-side dishes.. just one round and we nearly gave up.. sherlyn was even more high than me today.. and we concluded, that girl contradicts herself.. why? first she wld say she's full to eat.. then she would ask if we wanted any more and she would order.. and me and xiao min wld start laughing.. after a while, she wld say that she's full again and yes, you guessed it.. it became a cycle and we had no idea how many times this cycle repeated.. and it was damn damn damn funny.. lol.. xiao min almost scalded her hand while re-filling her green tea with hot water (or did she?).. she thought it was full already and so she moved her hand and scalded herself.. lol.. sherlyn found it amusing and there went another round of laughing.. as for me, those 2 gave me a nickname which i though that yes, it's cute and funny but kiddy.. haha.. i shan't mention it here.. but i predict those two will tag it on my tagboard.. haha.. and they suggested i change my blog address to the nickname.. forget it man!! it's just too kiddy.. haha.. and the nickname came from the skirt i was wearing today.. lol.. anyway, here are the pics that we took today!! :)


our 2 sets of side orders.. and this wasn't the end of it..


our yummy handrolls!!


xiao min and her chawanmushi..


sherlyn and me!! she and her contradicting speeches.. lol..


presenting to you my dear sherlyn and my all-time chit-chat fren, xiao min!!

haha.. lastly to end off!! i'm happy that my MBS coursework is an A and 2nd in class!! ok, i'm not boasting but yah, i'm happy!! just wanna share the joy with you peeps.. anyway, to yee sin: sad u didn't come.. see, you missed out the fun!! haha.. next time.. :)

i've been feeling rather restless today.. since last night till now.. didn't really sleep well last night.. was feeling too warm, so in the end, the fan was at speed 2 and blowing at me.. and yet! i didn't sleep well till this morning.. kept tossing and turning.. no idea why either.. and i'm somehow losing my appetite.. wondering if it's because of exam stress.. making me lose my appetite and my sleep..?? to conclude, i just felt time pass rather slow today and just couldn't concentrate.. literally, i was just being restless..

received an unexpected call today from caroline, my sec sch fren.. i smsed her rgd someone.. and surprisingly, she called me when i only expected her to reply back via sms.. haha.. had a nice 13-min chat with her! and haha, she kept asking me whether me and my new eye candy had anything going on.. and he was the reason why i smsed caroline.. haha.. apparently, she knows his existance but dunno him as a fren.. lol.. after the phone call, i continued to chat with her a few hours later online and haha, when she went offline, she wished me good luck.. haha.. come to think of it, good luck? hmm.. in becoming frens or something more than frens?? haha.. time will tell..

started my studying already.. a topic a day for each subject and my first subject on my list was... *drum roll* HRM!! just read through the intro lecture cause i think intro lecture can only come out mainly for mcq?? lol.. and because i mentioned that i was restless, i couldn't concentrate.. maybe cause of the weather as well.. (ok, marianne, dun find excuses.. just say someone was on your mind..) k, whatever.. so yup, my studying made its debut again!! haha.. as for tmr, coming home during the break to get my finance tutorial and the past year papers for sherlyn to photocopy.. i dun wanna bring to school cause it may be too heavy.. so i'd rather go home.. at least i can rest.. might as well.. haha.. sakae sushi after MBS lecture!! looking forward to it!! haha.. but sadly, yee sin's not joining us.. she put us on an aeroplane and fly us far far away.. haha.. she knows what i mean lah.. lol.. owells.. ok, i'm going back to play games.. till the next post.. night peeps!! =)

the many sides to the girl called MARIANNE...

i asked 2 frens today if having more than 1 eye candy was ok.. and their reply was 'yes!'.. haha.. i think i've got an additional eye candy.. lol.. ever since i started helping with church events, i noticed him already.. hmm.. comparing looks, haha, he's quite good-looking, i swear! really.. better looking than *ahem*.. his name is the same as my cousin's and i found his friendster account and for the fun of it, i added him.. lol.. then again, no harm, rite? since we belong to the same church.. and yes, i see him almost every week in church.. lol... he's really really good-looking.. haha.. so an additional eye candy to my list.. and talking about eye candy, haha, i think that guy in my public speaking class is old news, is over.. haha.. i mean, it's just an eye candy.. so i'm not taking it seriously.. lol.. and like what sherlyn said, eye candies can see more.. free one!! haha.. so yah, no harm.. =)

my nose isn't in good condition today.. have been sneezing since this morning i woke up.. and i got pissed off at 7 plus in the morning.. argh!! but anyway, that's not the main issue.. came back from church.. received an sms from hui yee, asking me to go out.. but i think we're going out for dinner so i turned her down and i wasn't exactly feeling well.. well, we can always go out after my exams.. lol.. =) and something to make me feel better, i've watched episode 10 already even though it wasn't in cantonese.. no choice.. the videos uploaded were all in chinese.. lol.. hopefully episode 11 is in cantonese.. ok, i'll end here.. shall spend my last day slacking b4 it's serious business tmr onwards.. =)

my eye candies dun last very long..
as for this new one, hmm.. we shall see..
but imagine this bearing fruit..
lol.. ok, marianne.. back to reality...

*edits:
if my mum becomes a grand-godma, would that make me a god-aunt? haha.. baby jaden's super duper cute!! ahh!! ok, i'm out of control when it comes to babies.. and i'm not feeling well again.. shucks.. crush or eye candy? we shall see... =)

HAPPY NATIONAL DAY FRENS!! haha.. time sure pass very fast.. it's august alr.. ok, i think there isn't any link to that.. but anyway, i need to make some considerations to my study schedule.. was actually considering of sleeping late and wake up late.. slp late like at 1 am and wake up at 9, 10 am.. so i still get my 8-9 hours of sleep.. of course, that's during my study week and the days which i don't have classes this coming week, mainly monday, wednesday and friday.. yes, me and xiao min share almost the same off days just that i have an additional day than her.. haha.. and of course, i was also thinking of how i should get around studying.. maybe at night then i'll come online to check my mail and relax for an hour or 2.. of course, catch my 溏心風暴之家好月圓.. that shall be an incentive if i finish what i have to study for the day.. and yes, it's time to work out my study schedule.. lol.. exams.. i'm taking it as a part and parcel of life.. shouldn't that be the case?

ok, enough of school and study plans.. i foresee sherlyn coming after me.. haha.. i made a sweet sweet dream last night.. nothing to do with school peeps and raymond lin.. i dreamt that i was in a relationship and gosh, it was soooo soooo sweet.. haha.. yikes! i think i'm watching too much HK romance shows already.. lol.. but the dream made me smile in my sleep.. haha.. i guess this is what they call sweet dreams.. anyway, the girls are informed of the tuesday plan already!! yeah!! sake sushi, chit-chat session and laughs.. next thing is to go home after MBS tutorial or not?? lol.. still in the midst of consideration.. maybe i will.. to rest and get energised for the bonding session after that.. lol.. but if the gang is going out to eat lunch, maybe i'll follow.. and you know what? this week is the last week before the exams and most prob the last few times i'll talk to my clique? have realised that actually i got nothing in common with the two of them... i mean, you can tell.. but for the guys, haha.. plenty of chances especially if i end up in the same class as either shaun, ben or melvin.. looking forward to having them as classmates next sem again!! =)

i've finished watching 溏心風暴之家好月圓 episode 9.. ooohhh.. so nice!! haha.. the female character played by linda chung is starting to like the male character played by lin feng!! OMG!! haha.. but i dun understand why eventually she ended up with bosco wong's character.. hmm.. watch on and i'll know.. and yes, i know exams are approaching.. but one episode a day.. shall take it as an incentive to study in the afternoon.. haha.. just to find one episode is not easy.. lol..

anyway, after much consideration, i went for HR today.. the lesson itself was 30 mins while waiting for the class was another 30 mins.. so i ended at 3 and was home by 3.20p.m.. how nice.. felt it was a waste of time even though the tutor went through the answers for MCQ for the main paper last year.. came home, slacked a bit before meeting yee sin to exercise.. ok, i was more of playing than exercising.. haha.. we chatted and ate ice-cream and discussed what we were going to do for our outing on tuesday! and apparently DJ can't join us again because she went back to malaysia today due to family matters.. owells.. if i were to say sherlyn and my bb tea mei yuan, then DJ and our tuesday outings also mei yuan.. dun u think so?? but plan for tuesday is to go sakae at TM and eat and slack and have fun!! note that, ok, sherlyn, xiao min and yee sin??!! it's a deal.. our last tuesday outing before study week (although we'll be meeting up during study week..) looking forward to it.. =)

some things are not meant to be...
and I'll leave it to fate to decide..

I'm dead tired.. morning class from 9am till this evening.. and and and!!!! JAP PRESENTATION IS FINALLY OVER!!! haha.. and today was the last lesson.. which simply meant that me and sherlyn got full attendance for jap tutorial!! haha.. looks like next week we'll be chilling out after finance lecture.. lol.. anyway, it was raining damn heavily just now.. was stuck in school with the girls after photocopying exam papers.. but maybe it was fate, i coincidentally bumped into him outside the library.. and seriously, i didn't expect it.. so like what sherlyn say, got fate (you yuan).. haha.. owells.. leaving it to fate.. and i have no idea why my eye was red.. contact lens? or just simply too tired?? i dunno.. and my house's lifts all broke down.. yes, all 3 of them.. so i waited for mum at the void deck and climbed up to the 14th floor with her.. at the end of it, i was damn hungry and tired and i was having gastrics.. boy, i ate 4 pizza bread after that while waiting for dinner.. haha...

my thoughts all seem to be in a mess.. someone, clear my thoughts for me, yeah?? and i don't feel like going for HR tutorial tmr.. hopefully it's the last lesson?? but i've got my doubts now.. owells.. i'm out of here... nights peeps.. =)

they make me feel so sian.. thank goodness i'm seeing them for the last time tmr.. lol.. i'm 98% not going for the last jap tutorial.. haha.. i'd rather slack lor.. anyway, i just hope lecture dun end so late and i can finish my lunch in 30 mins, even if it meant i was to suffer from an uncomfortable tummy after that..

ok, enough of that.. i slacked my day today.. haha.. finished 6 hot dog buns!! but it was those mini ones that would be gone within 5 mouths.. lol.. it was so nice sleeping in till close to 11.. haha.. i love mondays, wednesdays and fridays!! cause i get to sleep in and get 9-10 hours of sleep.. haha.. dun be envious.. lol.. btw, my very nice neighbour, yee sin, came over in the evening to rehearse with me my jap.. she said i not bad.. and i think so too, taking into consideration that i dun have that many lines.. haha.. oh, this reminds me.. TYS!! dessert tmr?? lol.. ok, i'm out of here..

quoted from xiao min:
main exams = time to get serious and less going out...
this is my main point for the month of august...
gambatte dears!! =)

money is the root of all evil.. haha.. only xiao min, yee sin, sherlyn know what i'm talking about.. haha.. MBS tutorial was boring as usual.. HR revision lecture.. i was falling asleep even though i knew the lecture was impt.. after that, yee sin and xiao min came to my place for lunch and we watched tv and played scrabble.. i fell asleep for a few minutes while watching tv.. was dead sleepy and i lost to the both of them at scrabble.. as a result, i treated them to ice-cream from the mama shop.. haha... went to ehub to meet sherlyn after that..

the four of us went insane at ehub.. and today, sherlyn was even more high than me, after she bought toto and the winning prize was $8 million.. haha.. we had bubble tea and sushi and we chatted a lot and laughed a lot.. but sadly, time passes fast.. i was still thinking on whether i should meet the class peeps for dinner since they were at ehub's k box as well.. called ben and asked him.. but in the end, i left with the girls.. haha.. and at the bus stop, we saw ben! haha.. and ben saw the crazy side of us 4 girls.. lol.. we were literally insane sia.. kept laughing and laughing abt the winning draw.. haha.. but on the way back, we were soo tired that we stopped laughing.. but sherlyn still a bit mad lah.. haha.. lol.. but really, i really enjoyed myself every tuesday during our bonding session.. i so hope me and sherlyn will end up same class and that our bonding session continue even after exams.. =)

sherlyn and her bubble tea...
yee sin and her peppermint...
xiao min and her gelare ice-cream...
me and my hyperness...
I SO LOVE THESE GIRLS!! =)

final decision made!! i'm not going with them to k box tmr.. and i think even if i do go, i may not sing.. and like what i told sherlyn before, i will never open my mouth to sing in front of guys i like unless he's my other half, then it's a different matter.. lol.. so instead of going with them, i'm going to go out with the following lovely girls: sherlyn, xiao min and yee sin!! =) haha.. honestly speaking, i really did want to go with them to k box but you know, i thought hard and long.. some people who may be going may be people i don't want to hang out with.. so far, i know who's going but it isn't because of them that i decide not to go.. well, other factors played a part as well, for example my physical condition.. my throat only got better today.. to conclude, i'm hanging out with the girls tmr.. =)

HR revision lect tmr.. dun think i'll bring my notes.. but just foolscape paper.. rather jot down the more impt parts and then copy over to my notes.. lol.. saves me bringing that thick stack of notes as well.. lol.. MBS tutorial before that.. i think i'll end up dozing in class or slacking away.. lol.. owells..

one month later and i've somehow put the unhappy events behind me..
i feel i'm more like myself now than one month ago..
i feel i'm more marianne now than one month ago..
in fact, i think i've changed quite a bit..
i used to not let people see the unglam side of me,
when i laugh out loud and having everyone look at me..

but now, i've shown those guys that unglam side of me(if you would consider it..)
i've shown them i don't really bother anymore of how outsiders look at me..
cause if i bother too much about how they think of me, how they see me..
then i won't consider that as the real me..
if i bother too much, what they're seeing will just be a pretence of me, not the real me..
and if i'm not the real me, then it's not life..
cause life is just being who i am, just being me, just being... marianne... :)

feeling not too good today.. church this morning.. got a little pissed off and irritated with the class today.. they weren't exactly angels.. i said before class started that i couldn't shout so they would have to keep quiet.. in the end? i still ended up shouting and my throat hurt so much i couldn't talk.. had small chats with some church people today.. enjoyed it.. =) saw godma today.. but felt so sorry cause i had to whisper while talking to her.. lol.. she asked me what happened to me and steph during mass when we left to go to the toilet one after another.. haha.. well, heehee, nature calls..

lunch at grandparents' place before coming home.. and ooh!!! i watched episode 6 alr.. lol.. most likely will catch episode 7 tmr? but after i completed school stuff.. or rather, after i complete my jap.. but i think i would watch at night bah.. then can have sweet dreams.. haha.. of course, that is if the episode's uploaded online alr.. my tutorials are more or less done, i guess?? gotta ask xiao min some qns rgd to finance.. lol.. and i think that will be tmr..

contemplating on whether i should go k box or not on tuesday after HR revision lect.. yes, i think i've mentioned this already.. but now, i'm starting to cough and the throat's still pain.. even if i dun go for k box, i may not go out with the girls too.. come home and rest since exams are drawing near and i'm not in best condition.. you know what i mean.. haha.. hmm.. it feels i've got lots to do but you know wad? in fact, there's very little.. haiz.. can't wait for jap presentation 2 to be over!! owells.. nights peeps.. =)

always a learning experience...

one post a day. lol.
posts about my daily life. how nice.
and while i'm enjoying life now, with the company of my dear family and frens,
i so hope i do not need to shout tmr.
i hope they'll be darlings tmr.
be angels tmr, please.
my throat is better but the occasional coughs and pain.
oh bother.
maybe i should give them a note in advance.
since auntie eve is not coming. lol.

feelings for today?
not too bad. but just tired.
went for happy food today.
and finally got my supply of lecture pads. lol.

they asked me along for k box on tuesday.
contemplating whether or not i should go.
or should i meet the dearies?
in the midst of 'serious' consideration.
after all, next week is the last week i get to relax and enjoy before the exams.
so should i or should i not? *thinks hard*

just felt like writing this way today.
no special reason.
no '...' but just one '.'
having post-溏心風暴syndrome.
lol.
nights frens.
=)

i finally found a website which i can watch 溏心風暴之家好月圓online daily.. haha.. =) i've completed 4 episodes.. waiting for episode 5 to load.. and yes, i will not neglect my studies especially now that exams are coming in 25 days.. i know my limit, so fear not!! one episode a day except for fridays.. lol.. it's damn nice and funny at some parts.. just loving it.. =)

and oooh... i saw baby jaden's pics.. he's sooooo cute!!! baby jaden's mum's grand-godchild.. which means she's jaden's grand-godma.. does that make me his god-aunt?? haha.. lol.. but he's sooo adorable and cute.. hopefully i'll have a chance to see him soon!! lol.. ok, my throat's not doing very well now.. off to take that *yucky* medicine.. eeww... lol.. enjoy the weekends peeps!! =)