after a short chat with a fren online, i suddenly had this reflection, not only for myself but also for them, i guess in some way or another...

it makes me happy to know that slowly and gradually, close frens of mine, mostly from sec sch, are getting attached.. whether or not the other half is their mr right, i'm happy for them to have found someone who likes them and they like other than their family members.. for some, they had to go through obstacles and worries before they can be together and for others, they're still experiencing obstacles even after being together for some time already.. however, there are also some who feel that their other half doesn't suit them and end their relationship while others may be having problems within that relationship.. so it actually still mean to say that even after you're together, there are still problems that you will face be it now or in the future.. and even before you can be together, you may have to undergo obstacles first before you can be together.. no matter what, all these problems and obstacles are just testing your love for each other.. although we can let nature take its course, but on the other hand, shouldn't we do some actions to gain our own happiness?? well, that is if you feel that he's the special one for you.. :)

talking about others, what about me? at this point in time, i'm also not very sure.. yes, i've agreed to give him up and let go.. i'm tired of thinking whether or not i'll end up in a relationship with guy A or guy B.. it just tires me out.. but i'm not against meeting new frens of the opposite gender.. it just broadens my social circle and some way or another, increase my chances of getting hitched.. but that is beyond my control.. i'm tired of thinking on the positive side and hurt myself indirectly.. it just feels like a burden to me after all that had happened.. i'm not sure if being in a relationship is what i want now although i know that even if i'm attached, i won't neglect my studies.. but is this what i really want?? i really don't know.. mayb it is, mayb it isn't.. let's hope i just meet that right guy next semester in year 2.. that's all i can wish for, i guess.. but i don't think i'll ever take the initiative to express my feelings again if i'm not sure of how the guy feels towards me.. yes, although i may be brave but i don't wanna get hurt again, if you know what i mean... :)

owells.. hopefully things go smoothly for me and i'll be able to find THE ONE.. will i?? just where is my ONE?? :S