Some things once lost, you'll never be able to get it back again. It would be your luck if you found it the first time but when you lose it the second time, maybe it's fate. This time, it's really gone and I'll never get it back.
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Be it as a friend or someone important to you or as your other half, be it who is it, I think it's always nice to have someone tell you that when you need someone, he or she is there for you.
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till then;

Mismatched; Evadne's 21st. A party of mismatched. A KCians get-together. Catching up and enjoying the company of each other in a cosy ambience. The fact that no matter how long we've not met up, KCians always are able to have topics to talk about even after many years has been proven. Wendy's 21st; The 2nd 21st party I've attended. Celebrated her 21st at Costa Sands Downtown East. Enjoyed the fun and the catching up with each other. Special guest invited and aim was achieved. Rented boyfriend was what he was called. An honour for him, a pride for me. Secrets exchanged and heart-to-heart talks. Great evening, is what I summed up. Up next, lunch date and board games. All with the same rented boyfriend. - till then;

Misconceptions cleared up. Never judge a book by its cover. Lesson learnt over lunch today. - Big Mommas: Like Father Like Son was comical. Along with the company. And I found myself a movie companion. - GLACE. Cheese tart. Yummy and nice. And added to my dessert list. - Secrets shared, listening ear to each other. A distant friendship got closer as the chats never end. What more can I ask for? - till then;

No matter how tired I am, how sleepy I am when I step into class, I love my Sunday mornings because of the little ones. And maybe, somehow, soon, there'll be another reason for me to love my Sunday mornings even more. Just maybe.
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till then;

Proven.
Every beginning of the month - MC.
Break this curse it shall be for April.
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放下包袱，开始往前走，别再回头。这是对我好的决定。踏出第一步，虽然害怕但还是勇敢地踏出去。结果不错，放下一点点，感觉开心一些些，直到那条简讯传来。心情变得矛盾，变得不知如何是好。但我对自己说，不管发生什么事，都绝不能回头，不能心软， 一定要坚持自己的承诺。那个不再让自己受伤的承诺。虽然那天玩得很开心，一切好像回到我们当初认识的我们，但一旦要离开时，所有的一切回到在还没见面时的一切。虽然不舍，但不得不这么做。要重新跨出第一步，虽然难免会害怕，会不想，但我知道最后的结果，一定是对我好，至少我宁愿因为我自己的决定而难过，也不想因为你而难过，宁愿因为我自己的决定而受伤，也不想我的伤直接来自你。

再怎么不舍，都该放手了。
再怎么难过，伤心难过的日子总回过去。
总有一天，我会因为经历那么多事而变得坚强。
总有一天，我不会再为你而伤心难过。

Stories about NS, life, our experiences and simply getting to know each other better sums up a great Sunday afternoon yesterday. Hectic afternoon but the company of the new group makes it great and relaxed after that. Looking forward to such sessions with them again!
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A question was asked yesterday. What are the 2 3-word phrases in life that is the most difficult to say? 1) It's my fault/I am wrong. 2) I am sorry. And the explanation to why "It's my fault/I am sorry" comes first was a great explanation and realisation to us. I shared it with my family yesterday and they agreed to.

We often say sorry for the sake of saying sorry, sometimes we do not even admit that it's our fault while saying sorry. But the whole meaning of saying sorry is to first acknowledge our mistakes, our faults and be sorry for them. Saying sorry doesn't necessarily mean that you are really sorry for them. Saying sorry is difficult but acknowledging your mistakes, your faults is even more difficult.
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I've moved on. I'm no longer gonna waste my time on people who doesn't appreciate what I'm doing for them, no longer gonna treat them that well when they don't deserve my kindness and is taking me for granted. It feels that all this while, people took me for granted, as if I owed them and it's right for them to treat me this way. In fact, there's no need for me to deserve such treatment. So I'm moving on. Getting on with my life. Cause at the end of the day, people will come to realise that it's their loss for not treasuring such a friend like me, and not mine. And at the end of the day, I'm gonna spend my time on people who deserves it more than others and that I deserve someone better.
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till then;

4th month;

I just realised that at the start of the past 3 months, I'm on MC. Argh. Terrible. And reason for cause of MC this month? Sore eyes. Conjunctivitis. How good. Specs to work tmr just so that I can wear my contact lens on Thursday. But luckily, it's only half day tmr. This week is indeed a short short work week.
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CNY in 2 days' time. Not so much excited. Nor have the festive mood. When there's not much to do during CNY apart from the routine visiting and new clothes, guess there's nothing worth looking forward to. Except for the long weekend this year.
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till then;

My 3rd month and it's getting busy already. New work arrangements result in more workloads. Work is piling up day by day. New cases, new challenges. Fun and interesting. Starting to leave me tired at the end of every day, with me starting to end work later and later as well. But I'm enjoying it and loving it. Totally no regrets. Once again, thanks to the nice and friendly colleagues and the nature of my job. (:
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Hair appointment on Saturday. Trying out a new hairstyle. Hopefully it'll turn out nice. If so, I'll be doing perm soft curls on Thursday. Talking about it, taking a short break from work from Thursday onwards. Plans to meet up with Viv on Thursday, off to Malacca on Friday, back on Sunday and saying hi to work on Monday. Gonna be a super packed week next week with just 3 days of work and loads of work to clear after my short break.
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Smiles on my face this week since Tuesday placed by a special someone. The smiles are still there as I recall our sms chat. It's keeping me going these days. Wonder when will be the next time I'll meet you. (:
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till then;

2011 - New year, new beginnings;

Just like the heading, 2011's a new year which also mark new beginnings. 2010 created many memories, made impacts in my life as well as many first times. Looking forward to more memories in 2011, creating more memories in 2011, writing new chapters in my life.
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Countdown on 31 Dec with PP was awesome. 2010 started well, ended great with a big bang with them at Seven, Iluma. And naturally 2011 started off well for sure. Drank, a bit high but total enjoyment. An unexpected surprise came along as well and it did made me smile.

Singing session was up next last night. 3 hours of singing came along with laughter and great gathering. Another total enjoyment. The last night of 2010 and the first night of 2011 spent with them was just awesome. Looking to more of such impromptu gatherings.
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till then;

Christmas eve party was great. Enjoyed myself with the company and Gulliver's Travels. Nice movie with non-stop laughter. Got home at 3 plus am. Totally tired but worth the tiredness. Next up would be New Year's eve party. Gonna be lots of fun as well. (:
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On a sidenote, I've decided to change my wallet after much hesitation. Black prints on my wallet after family lunch yesterday made me turn off and sad cause it was a birthday gift from Clique 2.2 and I treasured that wallet a lot. Now, it'll be kept in my cupboard. Getting it on Friday before the party and high chances is that I doubt it'll be white although it's nice.
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Feelings messed up once again. Thrown into a state of confusion and full of question marks surround me. Don't seem to understand the actions done and the reason behind it. In fact, don't seem to understand anything at all. From the happy Christmas mood to a emo Christmas mood, who's the only one who can change my mood such drastically. The answer's pretty known.
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till then;

Sakae sushi at Changi Airport T2 with Liang Yi, Ms Xinyi, Ms Gem and Mr Shunjie. Late dinner/supper yesterday night was AWESOME. Enjoyed myself last night with the laughter, the plates of side orders, sushi and temaki. Missed them a lot and it was nice meeting up with them last night. Gift exchange of Body Shop presents, tie and tie pin and Zinc bag. And they liked my presents so it was a relief for me. Still waiting for Liang Yi to open his. Haha. It wasn't anything special but it was the thought that counts. Received my 1st Christmas present from them too. A pretty star pendant and earrings. And soon, the pendant will be around my neck! (: Didn't bring my camera in the end to capture these lovely memories. But it's ok. These memories are kept in my heart. Looking forward to 31 Dec now. Countdown to 2011 with them and I'm sure it's gonna be lots of fun as well! :D
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till then;

At some point you will realise that you have done too much for someone, that the only next possible step to do is to stop. Leave them alone. Walk away. It's not like you're giving up, and it's not like you shouldn't try. It's just that you just have to draw the line of determination from desperation. What is truly yours will eventually be yours, and what is not, no matter how hard you try, will never be.

Maybe this is what I'm doing now. Neither giving up nor not giving up. Maybe I've done too much and I should stop and walk out of everything. Cause like the quote, what is truly yours will eventually be yours, no matter how long it takes. But if it isn't meant to be, then really, no matter how hard I try, it'll never be mine.

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till then;

Throughout life, you will meet one person who is unlike any other. You could talk to this person for years and never get bored, you could tell them things and they won't judge you. This person is your soulmate, your best friend. Don't let them go.

Felt this way before. Felt that you could be the one. We used to talk about anything and everything. But silence now lies between us most of the time. Miss the past. But what's gone has gone. What's left is only memories. Memories that no one can take it away from us. While these memories are important to me, I hope they're important to you too.
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On a side note, end of 1st month. Tomorrow is the start of the 2nd month. December's just going to be more hectic, more busy with colleagues going on leave etc. Work is starting to pile with so many things to attend to. Only worry is that I'm too careless in my work and make stupid mistakes. Only worry is that I won't be able to perform as well as I'm supposed to.
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till then;

Car rides that ended up driving in circles, dinner at White Sands, laughter and jokes we shared all sum up to 1 word: AWESOME! Sunday evening / night was totally great with the company of Wendy, Liang Yi, Shi Qi and Ke Yuan. This weekend is the best weekend I've ever had since I started work. And the fun we had yesterday is definitely leaving a smile on my face for at least today! (:
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till then;

Glad that there's a break this week. Somehow I really need this break despite last week was the only week so far that I worked for 5 days. That's why I say I've come to appreciate the weekends and public holidays even more now.
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Edited.
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till then;

End of 1st week. Colleagues pretty nice and friendly. Getting on well with them, I can say. Tired is also for sure. Still getting used to habits and routine. But 1 thing is that it's not as boring as what I think, even though it's reading, reading and more reading for now. But I'm gradually getting to handle work with help given by my colleagues. So guess things will definitely get better as the days go by. And just in 4 days, I've gone for a learning journey with colleagues and enjoyed myself much! (:
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So looking forward to Saturday. Clique 2.2 gathering, that's it! Totally keep me going and even though I may not meet all but yeah, it's still worth a trip. (:
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Question: single? Answer to her: half-half. More than friends but not a couple yet was my answer to her. That's the feeling I get. But still taking things easy. Maybe Christmas 2010 would change some things for us. Mass, lunch with relatives and family or simply dinner with family still remains unknown. Not sure if this is what I want from you. Well, at least unsure for now. But yeah, I'm happy with status quo even though thoughts of giving up said hi in my mind. So we'll just see how things go cause I still believe, if we're meant to be then no matter how long or what happens, we'll still end up together cause we're meant to be. (:
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till then;

A new beginning tomorrow. A new working environment. New colleagues. Definitely looking forward to it cause this was something I chose. But hopefully everything goes well. (: But of course, this would lead me to make another decision with regards to the familiar environment.

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Maybe I'm tired. Emotionally tired. Or maybe cause being sick causes me to be emo and think this way. But the thought of giving up crossed my mind and this time, it seemed firm to me. But could this be the first or the second? Is this for real? I simply have no explanation for it now. Cold war? Fights? Did we? No, we didn't. But maybe this weekend, I just don't really have the mood or don't really want to see him. Yet now what's coming across my mind is did she ask him that too? The answer to it is still a question.

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Contradictory, yes it may be. But this time round, no matter how tough it'll be or how difficult this new journey will be, I'll hang in there cause I know I'm not alone. My other friends are experiencing the same thing too. And at the same time, we're fighting together. You for the nation, me for this new journey that's lying ahead of me.

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till then;

I'm imperfect. So are you. But when 2 imperfect individuals come together as one, that's when their strengths and weaknesses complement each other and they become PERFECT in the eyes of each other. And that's what I wish for the both of us as well. (:

till then;

Simple yet memorable. Just 3 simple words to describe my birthday this year. This year was different than the other years. The simple birthday message from you made me smile, made me super happy cause it was the 1st birthday message received in the first few minutes of 24 August. And what made it even more special and memorable was that I spent it with you. Just you alone is enough to make me smile from the heart. (:

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till then;

A new beginning to a new start. Hard work and effort went in to get results. Results shown. A new position. Us all on the same level. Our efforts paid off with such results. This August, it's all about hard work and effort again. But success doesn't come on its own. Success comes with teamwork. And that's what we're all fighting together for, to be successful.
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1 of the few birthday wishes I have has come true. What about that 1 simple wish of mine, coming along with all that I did? Will it be fulfilled as well? It all depends on an individual's choice.
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till then;